~Summer Fun~

Well a lot has happened since I've last posted...

I've been to a psychologist. I have severe anxiety and agoraphobia. The day I found out; I was locked out of the house for 3 hours. I ended up sleeping over at my friends.

Summer holidays have come and gone; I'm officially a senior is high school. That's sorta terrifying...

I read about 10 books during the holiday (not nearly enough).

My study schedule has gone down hill dramatically. I used to study 4 hours every day, now I get home. Sleep until 8. Do necessary homework. If I don't do my homework or study, everything I do rather is never enjoyed because all I feel is guilt.

I feel constantly bored and depressed or in this anxious turmoil. Either way; I have no control. Hence why I cut myself while my parent was away for 10 days.

Somehow, I always get myself close to 2 people and we form a threesome. Then those 2 people start to like each other, and I am left. I've gotten myself in that position again, and usually it entertains me (for a while, anyways). But now I'm just bored.

It's Saturday morning and I literally have nothing better to do than do my homework. I'm considering doing some. I'm so bored. No tv show, movie, friend drama, or BOOK (!!!) entertains me.

For Christmas, I got 18 books. Hopefully I'll post which ones they were, and discuss them. Only if I'm not doing my ~fun~ schoolwork.

I'm seeing my psychologist in about an hour. Fun.

Apparently my agoraphobia derived from my alcoholic father. Yay. I've never talked to anybody about it, so that was a bit of a shock.

So my choices for entertainment right now are:
- assignments (due in 3 weeks)
- self harming (but it's really hot and it's gonna suck wearing long clothing)

Bye for now, I guess.

Happy new year,

the other one